A softer way through hard things

I actively avoid pain. Physical, emotional and mental. I’m not sure what other kinds of pain there are, but I avoid those too. I know that this may sound problematic, but I promise, it is quite a powerful tool of life. We can call it, my “harm avoidant approach to life”. Physical fitness demands some sort of pain and resilience. My pursuit of fitness is a stark contrast to my avoidance of pain in any form…or is it?

I have actively minded my weight for more than a decade now, since I was a teenager. Most of my choices when it comes to fitness routines are towards weight management and it shouldn’t come as a surprise that I am a cyclist.  

Cycling is not just about fitness or weight, it’s medicine for the body and therapy for the mind. It also saves me a ton of money on my commute, both to and from work.

Everyone has a voice in their head. Mine speaks to me very softly. She keeps me from any form of pain. When I started my cycling journey, I would take note of tough terrains and just not do them. The voice in my head told me that I wasn’t built for it. But slowly I started rebelling against her and seeking out the tough terrains. I challenged myself to do it and conquered the small elevations one by one.

The voice in my head caught up. She has never been against me so she started challenging me too. I would be so tired cycling uphill and she would point out a bush on the side of the road or a pothole in the road and ask me to pass it. She would break the long distance down to mental checkpoints and number them. If I am at checkpoint 3 and my body is asking me to stop, she convinces me to get to point 7 then rest, instead of stopping at point 3. But, when I get to point 7, she reminds me of all the checkpoints that I have covered and points out that it was not as hard as I thought. So, there really is no point in stopping and that I should just push on. That is how I end up completing the ride.

Like all exercise, the feeling afterwards is indulgent; like a perfectly baked cookie, or the rush of a long-awaited getaway. It’s a natural high that blends energy and calm, leaving you both satisfied and recharged. In other words, cycling is my elegant loophole. I avoid pain by pedaling through it, only to be rewarded with joy. It is a refined form of hurt aversion, trading short-term discomfort for the long-lasting high of endorphins and the countless benefits of cycling, for the body and mind.